Why Not to Overshare on Social Media

Narcissism or new social norm? What does oversharing online say about our 21st century selves? Associate Professor of Psychology Simon Boag explains.

Oversharing is similar a digital tattoo, a expert thought at the time, merely non always easy to get rid of.

Too much information: Things we used to consider private are grist to the daily social media mill.

"What's on your mind?' asks Facebook every time y'all sign in. And the floodgates open: rants, raves, regrets, and videos of the kids, along with photos of sport injuries, beauty routines, smashed avo, and the dog bobbing for apples.

In the New World Order, friends are our audience, and posts are the new public journal. Fear of missing out (FOMO) plunges usa into a globe of other people's status updates, plans, and check-in locations.

Things we used to consider private are grist to the daily social media mill. It's part of the push to be seen as 'authentic'. There's new value in vulnerability and spilling your guts. It's what some are calling contagious vulnerability, and role of a new language of mental self-intendance.

Death of the stiff upper lip

Many oversharers assume that their main value is pleasing others with their stories and jokes, says Heather Havrilesky, an American writer, essayist, and humorist who writes the advice column 'Ask Polly' for New York mag.

"I've suffered from this disease for decades," she declares. "Oversharing was ever my opening gambit and my parting shot … my warm-upwardly calisthenics and my social cool-down. Oversharing, for me, lived at the ruddy-hot middle of any good friendship: Yous tell me mode too much about yourself and everyone else you know, and I do the same."

In the covert narcissist a certain vulnerability goes with the sense of self. They recall they are better than the next person, but are non as sure of themselves.

For many, the number of likes, comments and followers that derive from social media sharing is a measure of influence and importance. It tin can dictate the day'southward mood.

The stiff upper lip is a thing of the by, and rightly so. Mental health issues and atmospheric condition like post-traumatic stress disorder suggest that the stiff upper lip is not a functional model; people do need to be honest virtually their vulnerability to heal.

Australia's R U OK? suicide prevention campaign, for example, is well-nigh trying to get people to talk honestly about their mental health.

The oversharing tipping point

So where does vulnerability end and narcissism brainstorm?

Self fixation: The Greek myth of Narcissus, who falls in love with his own reflection, is the origin of the term narcissism.

Narcissism by and large refers to having an inflated sense of self-importance. A narcissist by and large lacks empathy, intimacy and feels an abundance of entitlement.

There is an important distinction to brand between overt and covert narcissism. An overt narcissist is the person who thinks he or she is better than everybody else, who has a grandiose sense of self and is non afraid to bear witness it.

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In the covert narcissist a certain vulnerability goes with the sense of self. They think they are better than the next person, feel entitled, but are non every bit sure of themselves. Information technology'south a narcissism that can stay subconscious and breed resentment.

In the late 1970s, American historian Christopher Lasch wrote about the developing culture of narcissism in the United States, the ascension of entitlement and of celebrity. The want to be famous for the sake of beingness famous without much achievement behind it, he noted, was becoming more and more the norm.

Let's talk nearly me

Said Lasch: "Thriving on the applause of the masses, these celebrities set the tone of public life and of private life as well… The beautiful people … live out the fantasy of narcissistic success, which consists of nothing more than substantial than a wish to be vastly admired, not for one's accomplishments just simply for oneself, uncritically and without reservation."

Cheque us out: Selfies arrived with the engineering that enabled them, making them a subcultural norm, says Associate Professor Boag.

This kind of social invasion of narcissism, especially in the Western world, has intrigued researchers for the past few decades, and studies by people like Jean Thou. Twenge and W. Keith Campbell have shown that every decade there has been an apparent  increase in narcissism.

A meta-analysis by Liu and Baumeister in 2016 found college levels of narcissism were linked to all social networking activities – posting, status updates, interacting, how many 'friends' we had.

A report found that the risk of oversharing in conversation – or providing a listener with as well much irrelevant detail – increased with historic period.

People often indicate to selfies as having a egotistic element merely really they are a subcultural norm today. They arrived with the engineering that enabled them.

Oversharing is not exclusively the domain of digital natives. A study past researchers from the University of Edinburgh and Northwestern University in Illinois found that the risk of oversharing in conversation -- or providing a listener with likewise much irrelevant detail – increased with historic period.

A changing sense of self

The sense of self in Western societies today is probably different from what information technology was 100, 500, grand years ago. The selves we are in mod societies adapts to new technologies, norms, situations and challenges.

There are dissimilar conceptions of cocky, too, depending on where you live in the world. There is a distinction made between individualistic cultures (like the Usa) and collectivistic cultures (Japan, for example).

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In individualistic cultures how you are is down to you and not so much your connections. With collectivist senses of self, people are more bound to their place in society, a social group, or family; it'south more of a network.

Oversharing doesn't accept to be negative. In that location can be positive outcomes. People brand connections, feel a greater sense of authenticity, and establish a digital community that is important to them.

The other side of the coin, of grade, is rejection, the malevolence of trolls, consequences, postal service-post feet … and that enduring digital tattoo. It's a very circuitous social interaction.

Simon Boag is Associate Professor in the Department of Psychology.

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